Chasing Your Passion

Here's the thing- we all spend a lot of time at work. For the lucky ones, you're doing what you love as your job. Some people hate what they do for a living and if you're like me, you enjoy your job but you're not incredibly passionate about it.

The money is good, the insurance, the stability are all things that are valuable to an adult; Especially one with a family. But the one thing that I lack is that fire in my belly for what I do. My wife took it upon herself to chase her passion and start her own photography company and she is kicking large quantities of ass doing it. She maintains a full time job, is a great mother and still finds time to go out and do her photoshoots. Her hardwork is not only admirable but it's friggin impressive. My goal would be to put my wife in a position where she can do that as her only job.

What is it that I'm passionate about? Well, since I don't think I have a great chance at becoming a defensive coordinator in the NFL, I'll stick to something I'm actually decent at... Writing.

A bunch of years ago before I came to my current company, I got laid off from my previous job and was a mid-20's unemployed jabroni. It took me years to figure out that what I did with that free time was what I should be doing for a career. I vividly remember my then girlfriend going to bed one night so she could be up for work the next morning; When the silence fell upon our condo, I started writing. I think it was probably about 9 or 10pm. I wrote and wrote and wrote until next thing I knew, my girlfriend was getting up and going to work. I put my head down and wrote and wrote some more. Again, she had come home from work and I was still writing.

I wrote for 24 hours straight, fueled by energy drinks and the typical creative muse we all know as Mary.

Eventually I got a job and regained my status as contributing member of society and that story hit the shelf. It was a full story that was only partially written. And for the next few years, it would call to me in the night... "Do me! Do me!"

Now, typically I jump up when I hear that statement flung at me, but when it comes to writing, it's sometimes difficult to get started for whatever reason.

Flash forward another handful of years. I'm married, have a beautiful wife, beautiful daughter and am a homeowner. Life is good. But as I got promoted higher at my company, my goals got loftier. I considered going back to school to get my masters, I considered switching jobs with more opportunity to grow, but in the end it was watching my wife effortlessly make the photography game her bitch that made me rethink my strategy.

I could easily go pay another ass load of money on tuition to get another piece of paper that "proves" I'm worthy to be the head of some corporate department, but is that what I want? Good pay really isn't that appealing when I'm doing work that is only mildly motivating, not to mention the lack of family time that comes with moving up the corporate ladder.

So what did I do?

I dusted off that story and got back on it. Here I am, October of 2014, 6 years since that energy drink filled evening led me to write 50 pages and I'm at about 85,000 words of this book. With the remaining story and editing left, I consider myself about 75% there. I have no concern about the quality of the story or the potential audience as I'm fully aware that there are many nerds like myself that would be interested in the subject matter. But what I'm concerned with is what happens if I can get it published?

My life would change drastically, going from employed and supported by a great company to being self-employed with nobody but myself to rely on. That's the ultimate goal though, right? I think that's the American dream and frankly that was what my dad always told me to aim for.

So before my dad passed away in March of this year, I told him he'd better make sure and be ready to see his son on the Best Seller's list one day. I think I owe it to him, my family and myself to follow through with my best efforts to achieve that. I write this article because I'm not in a position to work on my book at this moment, but I had words that wanted to come out of my head.

So please if you're reading this, keep a tab on me. I plan on hitting you guys with something sooner than later. Some of the most famous writers of our generation (JK Rowling for example) got turned down dozens of times before their book sold, but when it did... IT WAS ON LIKE DONKEY KONG. And that excites me. The idea that my imagination could entertain people is ridiculously appealing to me. Auditing customs entries and discussing raw material pricing with the manager of a factory in China is not as exciting.

So... As I've done before on my blog, I'll state it again... I will eventually be able to say that I do what I love for a living... And that's create. 

Surviving Technology

I'm a tech geek.

I love gadgets, I love gizmo's and I love anything with a power button. It started with a Nintendo, it then moved on to a calculator watch that could hold all your phone numbers! It moved on to pagers, then a Nokia cellphone and my addiction to tech eventually landed me with a dependence to "The Core". [I JUST penned this term, you're welcome]. Apple products are typically great products in quality and value (even at the high ticket prices) but it's not even the devices themselves that I think we're addicted to, it's IOS itself.

From your favorite apps to iCloud to iTunes, if you own an iPhone or Mac, you're likely committed to the infrastructure of Apple... or as it's been known for centuries... THE CORE. With that said, I'm fine with it. My opinion for most things I buy is that I desire a good value over a good price. Every Apple device I've ever owned has been heads and shoulders above in quality and stability than any other electronic device or system I've ever had. Virus', glitches, lagging, these are all things other devices commonly had happening. None of that with Apple. When glitches occur with Apple products, they quickly code in a patch and your device updates itself. It's just EASIER.

After having just got on my knees to give a Steve-Jobs, I want to say that I'm OK with this addiction because I think that technology really does make life a little easier. I thought about this blog topic as I sit here on a Saturday night looking at 10 devices of various types in front of me; All going at the same time. On one hand, I'm being incredibly efficient, but on the other, it does seem a little overboard.

Let's just say that I'm watching football on mute on my iPad, backing up movies to an external hard drive, listening to my favorite Spotify channel on a Bluetooth speaker via my iPhone and writing this on my Netbook.

And you won't catch me writing without the video monitor for my daughter sitting on my desk. I can't help it.....

But as I consider how all my gadgets tether to another gadget and how my wife can essentially text me calendar invites so all I have to do is press 'accept' to add to my calendar. I think about how I can buy anything from my phone, I think about all of this and step back to realize the type of dependence I have on technology. Think about how NAKED you feel when you forget your phone?!?!? When I was a kid, cellphones only existed in cars that we couldn't afford. You had to check in every few hours or something (at a payphone or friend's house), but there was a thing called the answering machine where when you couldn't get a hold of someone you told them why you were calling. Then if they caught up with you, you get to interact. If not, you don't. Side note: People were MUCH better at giving messages back then too.

Now, you get the benefit of having information or entertainment at the tip of your fingers at any time, but you're virtually reachable at any time too. Now Big Brother has slowly crept into everyone's lives. [Mountain Men excluded] What I find dangerous about it all is that you don't have to learn to be bored anymore. A lot of character is built by learning to be bored. How do you manage boredom? Destructive? Constructive? Contemplative? That's where you learn about you. Now we don't have to reflect on that sort of stuff.

My two and a half year old can operate an iPhone or iPad as well as any older person I know. Will her generation learn to manage technology in a healthy manner? Will they be a huge shit show? Currently I'm leaning towards the latter, but I am hoping I'm wrong and trying to do my part.

But as I can objectively see the short falls of this wave of technology my generation has been riding our whole lives, I don't care. It honestly has the same characteristics of a drug addict. I consciously know technology today could create problems, but it's so awesome I don't plan on stopping.

As is the case with everything, it's all about balance. You can't keep your nose buried in your phone or tablet all day, completely ignoring the world around you. #teenagers. I like to go to the gym or take my dog on a run, but I have to have my phone and earbuds. We like to take trips to see new places, but we have to use the computer to find them. I like to go golfing, but love my GPS watch for reads on yardage. It's EVERYWHERE. Apple could truly be the real life Skynet. Tell me you couldn't see Chris Hemsworth trying to defeat something famously known as THE CORE.

Now in writing this I've got to think about other things that are truly useful in technology. Wireless technology and smaller devices allow for you to require less space in your life. My phone is also my calendar, my entertainment library, my portal for everything in my life! I have a God damn Panda Express app on my phone! Wait in lines no more, order and pay on your phone and your grub is ready when you arrive. If you are anti-tech for some hippy reason, shame on you. Beef and broccoli ready with a few swipes of your phone? But I digress.

Like I said, I'm backing up my movies right now in an attempt to rid my shelves of uncountable DVD's. When I'm done I will have access to every single movie I own via my Apple TV. My daughter's sleep overs are about to crack off. WIFI, Bluetooth, DVR, On Demand... C'mon maaaan. I'm even considering swapping security systems to the AT&T plan where you can operate EVE-RY-THANG from your phone. EVERYTHING? EVE-RY-THANG. Let's also not forget that where Apple is the hardware king, Google is the software king. (By the numbers Microsoft might actually win that honor, but Bill's the richest man on the planet, so he can kick rocks) Google offers cloud based services for free and if you're a Chrome browser fan, no matter what device you use, all of your settings are there. It just makes things EASIER.

All in all, I'm grateful to be in a generation that got to see rotary phones and smart phones in our life times. I think it will provide a unique perspective a decade or two from now. I used to love to see that glint in my dad's eyes when I'd tell him about a function he'd really find useful on a device he's had for 6 months; I hope I keep that glint too. "Oh, you mean I can send pictures in a text message?"

I'd like to think that our generation has had to adapt to the fast moving train of technology, therefore we'll be more equipped to handle it as it comes, but I would've held that same theory true for music and I don't know what the hell they pass off as Top 40 or hip-hop anymore. So if you see me in public staring at my phone, go ahead and judge me. But did you know that fracking on the borders of Croatia have created tension among neighboring countries?

Tomorrow is Sunday and I will post this article knowing that most of my friends and family will ignore it because it's not NFL related, but I too will be at home, near a TV with every NFL game available and every device I own tuned into something fantasy football related. And because I have all of this stuff at my fingertips, I can play hide and seek with my daughter all morning too. Missed a play? Rewind. Missed a freak injury? YouTube it. (Yeah, I'm sick like that) Now... Let me be very clear... I'm not above shunning my family during a Seahawks game; I'm just saying that technology doesn't have to hinder you from being able to engage with the family. So nerd out safely, kids. And tomorrow as I sit on my couch in front of my mobile command center, I will watch people out my front window jogging in the fresh air and I'll think to myself... "Poor saps, don't they know what they're missing?"

Weekend in Whistler

Last weekend, me and a few guys from work took off to Canada to play golf! We got in on Friday and out on Sunday so it was a quick trip, but boy did I take in the culture. Here are some things I learned in my 54 hour trip to Whistler.

-Traffic in Vancouver looks a lot like traffic in Bellevue but with less Mercedes' and more smiles. I've never seen people so content to go 3 mph on the freeway. Excuse me, 4.82 kilometers per hour.

-Though it's completely practical and logical, fuck the metric system.

-People that say a 6 hour drive is "not that long" have way too much time on their hands. If I can watch Braveheart and Season 3 of Saved by the Bell on the car ride to somewhere, we should've caught a plane.

-Canada has the secret to keeping the outdoors feeling outdoorsy. They take care of it. People up there LOVE hiking, riding bikes and wearing skinny jeans in 80 degree weather. It's not coincidence that they look healthy and happy.

-The company I work for is baller status. The large company condo was located 100 yards from the clubhouse to Nicklaus North and in between the two were million dollar homes and shiny new cars.

-Australians obviously love Canada. I did not speak to a single service person (golf course, restaurants, shops in village) that was without an Australian accent.

-Whistler is filled with two kinds of people: Wealthy people and ski bums.

-A nice view and well maintained cuts can make a boring layout still a great golf course. There was little to no contour to the course and I was still in awe.

-Small things count. At the turn on Saturday, a course manager made small talk with us at the tee box as any nice guy would. When we were eating on the deck after our round, he came over and gave us each a gold Nicklaus North coin. It didn't take much effort, he just gave it to us as a token of thanks. That solidified the positive vibe of the course.

-Bears aren't as easy to find as bear shit.

-Chipmunks will steal your food right out of your cart. If it weren't for my affinity for Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers, I may have murdered one after snatching my muffin or taking huge bites out of my apple.

-On vacation with co-workers, HR is clearly not a concern.

-"Guys Weekend" premise is to get away... From work, from family, from reality...  but you often end up talking about them most of the weekend.

-Border agents typically aren't that jovial.

-My luck at the border is a sign that I should not traffic narcotics.

-I'm lucky and glad to be home.

Urban Float - Fremont : The Rabbit Hole

For a while now I've been itching to get into an isolation tank. For those of you unfamiliar with the practice, you essentially get into a tank of water for a form of meditation. Whooooa, pump your breaks everyone who instantly got skeptical of investing some time to read this... It was an experience I believe is worth sharing.

An isolation tank or a "sensory deprivation tank", is literally a tank of water. The water is treated with so much salt that the natural buoyancy is such that you literally have to put in zero effort to float. The water is body temperature so your skin does not need to use it's senses. Once enclosed, it is entirely black so your eyes do not have to use any of their senses. Also, aided by a set of ear plugs, your tank is typically near soundproof so your ears also use near none of their senses. This allows your mind to truly decompress.

The concept seems pretty simple, turn off all your accessories and the entirety of your brain power can be dedicated to thought.

I was turned on to the idea by one of my favorite comedians, Joe Rogan. He enjoys the tank so much that he had one installed in his house. I'm not against that idea. My wife had heard me talk about it a hundred times so for my birthday she bought me a session at Urban Float in Fremont.

The shop was right on Fremont Ave by the bridge, so I found myself a marginally legal parking spot and walked down to the shop. Upon entering I was pleasantly surprised at how nice it was. Light colored wood and dark tiles covered the room. A pretty lady looked up as I walked in and she was incredibly friendly. Honestly I was a little worried that I'd walk into a Hippy Hotel with lots of Converse and skinny jeans, but it just felt like a place to relax.

I checked in, she gave me a couple forms to fill out and told me to go upstairs and enjoy something to drink while my room was prepared. I walked upstairs in a pleasantly quiet building and came across what looked like the bachelor pad I would create if I was going for that "this furniture is not Ikea" vibe. The decor and lighting was soft and warm, colors that just invited you to stop giving a shit for a while. There was a water cooler and a beverage cooler. The beverage cooler had Pelligrino's and coconut water with a sign that said 'take what you want and pay up front'. In today's day and age, it's refreshing to see some trust in a business.

Right on time a guy greeted me upstairs and asked that I follow him to my room. When we got to the room I was instantly comfortable. There was a single shower with body wash, shampoo and conditioner all provided with instructions to shower before and after your float. He walked me through the routine. They play 10 minutes of music to lead you down the rabbit hole, then you get 45 minutes of silence, followed by 5 minutes of music to guide you out of the rabbit hole. He offered his opinions on preferences for the float, where to find various items like the light, call button and fresh water in case I got some salt water in my eyes. He looked me in the eye and genuinely directed me to enjoy myself.

Hopping into a swanky dark tiled shower with a huge rain shower head, I washed up and got in. I opted for the float pod vs the float room just because I thought they looked cooler, but the popular comment from friends I told about my pending adventure was that they'd be closterphobic. That's not typically one of my phobia's so I got in and closed that hatch immediately. There was a soft blue light in there so it doesn't feel like you just fell down a well. The water was body temperature as it should be, but as a guy who just got out of a hot shower, that was a little faulty at first. I lied back and began floating. It was as easy as advertised.

About 5 minutes in, I decided to get froggy and turn off the light. Fuck. It was dark in there! If I'm being honest, I did get a little anxious at that point. Your orientation really disappears when you're floating effortlessly. The pod wasn't big enough that I didn't occasionally float lightly into a wall, but somehow, with me jostling to itch my nose or put my arms back, I did not bump into the walls very much. Needless to say I had to manage that bit of anxiety if I actually wanted to relax.

Just as Joe Rogan had described so many times, it took me about 10-15 minutes before I was really comfortable in there. Trying to relax I had my eyes shut, but I realized that it was so dark that open or shut it was the exact same. It's an eerie feeling to have your eyes open and see absolutely nothing. Not even my hands when they were inches from my face.

As I stared at the ceiling I began seeing light waves as if the light bouncing off the ripples of water were reflecting off the ceiling of the pod. Only there was no light to reflect? Realizing this, it occurred to me that my brain was slightly hallucinating. No dragons or orange turtles swimming by, but with zero light I was still seeing something. The light waves soon turned to space. Faint clusters of stars, but that same beautiful blackness that is space. Yes, I'm a bit of a space nerd.

I floated there with an odd excitement that wasn't as physical as it was mental. My brain started racing, trying to capture ideas or revelations on topics that I'd always wondered about. For a moment I was treating this session like I was about to meet the Wizard of Oz and he was just aching to answer any cosmic questions I may have. But as I recognized the Daytona 500 of thoughts shooting through my synapses, I decided to take a deep breath and clear my head.

Admiring the view of what seemed like undiscovered constellations I found my brain starting to wander. It was almost like when you realize you're in a dream. All of the sudden something popped into my head so seamlessly that it felt less like an epiphany and more like I realized something I had known all along. Without getting too detailed, let's just say I've been writing a sci-fi book on and off for a handful of years and I've recently gotten it to a point where I'm ready to finish it but I feel like it needed a little more string to weave the story a little tighter and I'll be damned if there wasn't a big old ball of string unwinding for me.

Feeling like I was in a conference room with a group of writers trading ideas, I found myself saying "what if he did this?" , "what if he found out that?", "what if they went here?"... It was amazing. I'm generally really good at thinking of ideas, it's the whole aspect of retaining said ideas that has always escaped me if I'm without a pen and paper. So I just stuffed those ideas into my brain like a chipmunk would do with nuts. Just as I realized that I may have found that missing piece to my story, the 5 minute warning music slowly came on.

I sat there floating, reflecting on how it was possible that my brain just shit out so many golden ideas and I smiled. I was so eager to get out and make notes, that I was in and out of the shower before that 5 minute warning music finished. They had fresh towels and a nice bench to get dressed on, so although I was eager to start jotting down my notes, I made the decision to take my time and let it soak in.

They advise you to go upstairs after your float and have a cup of tea and chill for a few minutes. So that's what I did. I made myself a nice lemon chamomile tea and sat on that comfortable couch. I couldn't type the words into my phone fast enough. While writing I developed a couple more ideas to note. I was just grinning ear to ear.

I entered into this not really hoping for some physical cure, I was more looking for a mental treatment. And boy did I get it. I honestly think if I were a professional writer, actor or some big wig CEO, that regular access to a tank would be invaluable. My mind was in creativity mode, but I have no doubt that whatever things you want to exercise out of that cranium of yours, can be done with sessions in the tank. It was as if my brain was filled with knots of thoughts developed from day to day life and the tank allowed those knots to loosen so I could sort them out. This was only my first session, so there is much to explore still, but I'll be damned if that's my last session. The guy up front even said they would be opening a store about 5 minutes from my house this spring. That made me even happier.

Urban Float made the experience simple, easy and comfortable. I highly recommend it to everyone to try at least once. It may not be your cup of tea, but in today's fast paced world, I think you owe it to yourself to give it a shot. You may find life down the rabbit hole to be more fulfilling than you think.

Accountability

Accountability... It sort of seems like a rare quality these days. You grow up seeing people rise to a position of authority and as kids we were taught to respect these people blindly. We're not given reasons to respect them, the reasoning was often more just a "because". Whether it was a teacher, parent or coach, we were all just supposed to respect them. Forget the fact that one may be addicted to pills, one may be having an affair and the other is a degenerate gambler.

As I got older I began questioning things a little more; analyzing life in a deeper manner. I had a professor in college once tell me that the key to obtaining knowledge is as easy making the decision to never stop asking questions. And in what seemed like a simple exercise, became something more. I naturally question everything now, even the most inane things interest me. Sometimes I think the overbearing amount of questions I pose to myself and others has turned me into a cynic, but I'm also grateful to not be blinded by this horrendous web of deceit we call the media. It's a little scary to consider the fact that not everyone is as objective when consuming the garbage in the media and these same people can vote.

Accountability and integrity used to go hand in hand. Those qualities were a common gauge for judging a person's character. Nowadays though, accountability is more about what is provable and not. A man could get charged with murder who is clearly guilty, but in exchange for information or simply a signed confession that saves the tax payers money, these people can plead down to lesser charges. I understand the practicality of this kind of example, but what kind of precedent does that set for our society?

Murder is an extreme example to use and I'm not interested in debating your rights as an American, I simply wanted to convey that the lack of accountability today is a symptom of a greater flaw in our society. What that flaw is, I couldn't pin down at this moment, but I promise you at the top of Shit's Peak it is somehow tied to money.

I rant because of what I saw on the news this morning. In February, Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice was caught on camera dragging his unconscious fiance out of an elevator in Atlantic City. It was clear some Tom Foolery had occurred and the incident was "investigated". This matter was investigated both by the police and the NFL... I say investigated with a serious tone of sarcasm.

A high profile athlete was caught on camera in what seemed to be the aftermath of an assault. The footage that the media showed the public initially was an angle outside of the elevator. Rice emerged from the elevator dragging his then fiance like a roll of carpet. It seemed pretty clear that Rice had somehow been the reason she was knocked out but nobody saw him actually do it.

In hindsight I'm disappointed in myself for not recognizing the bullshit league response at the time.

When Solange Knowles tried putting an ass whoopin on Jay Z, the elevator footage was readily available for the public. I'm guessing that a hotel in Atlantic City that an NFL super star would frequent would have camera's in the elevator as well. So when the investigation was happening, how is it that they wouldn't request to see any relevant footage? Whether they did or didn't, it's a huge problem.

If this footage was previously unavailable as all the mouthpieces are claiming right now, wouldn't this hotel get hit with obstruction of justice? What does "unavailable" mean? Was the server down? Was the head of security on vacation in Mexico? Besides, what would they gain by withholding that tape? Bottom line is that the people in front of the microphones during this fiasco don't get to the positions they are in by being stupid. There is no way in hell that this footage was not seen.

The motive? Ha. #Money

Ray Rice is not only a key piece to a team that won the Super Bowl two seasons ago, but he is a powerful commodity of the NFL. Ray Rice had a respectable reputation in a city that needs a strong black role model, revealing the truth would only hurt the public...

Now, I'm speculating obviously, but regardless of the reasons for the cover up, it was wrong. The NFL handed down a two game suspension to Rice while fellow NFL player Josh Gordon was being suspended an entire season because he tested positive for marijuana; A drug that is both not a performance enhancing drug and is actually completely legal in two of the twenty-two states the league operates in. I'm pretty sure hitting anyone is illegal in all 50 states in the union.

I'm happy to report that the public did throw a pretty big fit about the suspension comparisons. The problem is that the league found a way to bury the story enough to where it was less of an actual issue and more of another topic to fill their own networks with discussion material. And now here we are.

While the team terminated Ray Rice's contract, I'm here to name a few more people who still need to be held accountable if we're to consider this situation 'dealt with appropriately'. Because there are two possible scenarios here and they apply to just about everyone involved. There is no better summarization than a line from the movie Casino. Tangiers boss Sam Rothstein had just fired the nephew of the Las Vegas Gaming Commissioner after allowing a string of jackpots to go off on a few slot machines within a few minutes, "Either he's in on it or he's incompetent, either way he's gone."

At the top of my list is the police chief in charge of the criminal investigation. You are either dirty or you suck at your job. Second on that list is NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. This piece of shit interviewed Ray Rice's fiance regarding that evening with RAY IN THE ROOM.

"Go ahead ma'am, please speak open and honestly about how that man right next to you may or may not have hit you on that evening in Atlantic City." Wink Wink

What a piece of shit.

That's not even worth expanding on. Any man that would ask a woman to finger their fiance as a person who has physically harmed her while in their presence is a complete scumbag. That isn't an error in judgement, that's an error in character.

Finally, I'd like to have Ozzie Newsome and any other Ravens personel fired for covering it up as well. I saw an interview with Coach John Harbaugh and I know he's not stupid, but his eyes told me that he never actually saw the video... I guarantee he knew what happened but not actually seeing the tape is a matter of plausible deniability, but Jesus, where is the line drawn?

The reason why accountability is my topic of discussion is that all parties involved were accountable to exactly what they had to be. Too many people saw Ray Rice that night to sweep it completely under the rug. But since Joe Shmo who can email the story to TMZ does not have access to elevator surveillance, it wasn't something they had to be accountable to. Not surprisingly the video leaked and now everyone involved is playing the accountability card.

As the story went, it was always implied that Ray Rice somehow knocked his fiance unconscious and it wasn't until the video went viral that they deemed it necessary to cut him. Seeing the video was more powerful than just hearing the story, but between two months ago when the suspension was handed down and now, the story is essentially the same, it's just now they have visual evidence of it. To suggest otherwise is just disrespectful. There would be NO reason to suspend Ray Rice unless it was understood that he hit her. You don't get a two game suspension for an accident.

So while all of the people involved are now trying to play the accountability card, what will happen next? Will they be held accountable or will we allow them to sweep this under the rug? The one thing all of these people have in common is power. Police Chief, League Commissioner or team General Manager, all have a lot to lose... The problem is, they have even more to gain by hiding these types of issues. And until our society remembers to value accountability and integrity to the point where we will not allow these shit heads to dictate what is a just punishment, we will continue to experience these heinous symptoms of a larger problem in society.

White River Amphitheater Oddball Comedy Fest

For our 5th anniversary I bought a pair of tickets to The Oddball Comedy Festival. It was at White River Amphitheater in Auburn, Washington and I must say that although the show was great, I've decided that the venue is the worst in the state.

It being a celebration of 5 years with my wife, I had hoped to have a seamless evening of entertainment but WRA was doing everything in their power to fuck that up. As is the case with most venues, beer and wine could be purchased anywhere, but liquor had a designated area. I have fairly recently developed an allergy to beer and wine, which at first was incredibly sad, but that's not the point. Because of these allergies, liquor is my only option if I want to loosen up before the show; this means whatever shit-show of a crowd exists in the designated area, I get to deal with them.

Firstly, to get into the liquor area you needed a wrist band. A line had seemingly developed outside of the 'spirits lounge' to get the wrist band. Only there were zero signs explaining the rules, so it was total pandemonium outside of this building. To figure out the drill you just had to hear people around you discussing what they had learned. The people handing out the wrist bands were about as helpful as Scotch tape on a submarine hull which was is annoying in itself.

Secondly, once we sat in a 10 minute line to acquire our wrist bands, we soon found out that there were dozens of people handing out the wrist bands and that even though you show your ID to get one, you still must show your ID at the door to this building AND when you buy your beverages. Besides wanting to handout ugly wrist bands, what's the point? And again, no signs anywhere explaining what to do. In my head the head cheese of this malfunction of an event looked exactly like 80's WWF wrestler, Lou Albano and he surely had a stain on his shirt somewhere.

Every single line for drinks was 20+ minutes and it wasn't even that busy. Some places took cards, some only took cash. Again there were no signs, so more than once did I see people get to the front of a 20 minute line only to find out this particular booth was cash only and they only had plastic. Oh and as I understand it, two of the ATM machines ran out of money.

They were hosting 8 nationally touring headliners, but I began to wonder if they knew that.

Once we got our $14 margaritas (that were actually large and delicious), we realized we could not leave the building with liquor. We proceeded to expedite our delicious beverages into our bellies, then making our way out to the food area where we sat in line again for another 20+ minutes. At this point we had spent a majority of our time at this festival standing in line. But eventually we had our drinks consumed, our food consumed and fresh beverages for the beginning of the show.

I splurged a little on these tickets both because it was our anniversary and because comedy is a unique form of entertainment where outdoor spaces are not always that great so I wanted to be relatively close. The good news is that from the point where we walked to and from our seats, the event was FLAWLESS. Even short lines for the men's room which is always a major plus.

The comedians were great. I mean, I would've been shocked if it went any differently because the festival consisted of eight headlining comics. The Roast Master himself, Jeff Ross was the host of the show with his newly bald headedness and as expected he delivered. It was awesome to him at work in person. You always see him ripping people on TV but the timing and skill is beautiful in person. We saw Demitri Martin who once had a decently funny show on Comedy Central that got canceled a while back. His style of setup, punch, setup, punch is always pretty funny but can get old if not done well enough. He did great! I may have laughed the hardest during his set.

Hannibal Burress, Whitney Cummings and Chris Hardwick all came in with a solid 15-20 minute set and the last part of the show was two 30 minute sets from Sarah Silverman and Aziz Ansari. Sarah took her set into the crowd and even found herself cuddled up with a 60 something year old lady who somehow found her way to the front row of this huge show. Aziz did what Aziz does and got excited and insightful; People ate that shit up as expected. Then with a great 1 hour set, I finally got to see Louis CK. All of the comics we saw were comedians I would likely pay to see by themselves, but Louis was on my bucket list.

I've now seen the likes of Kevin Hart in a small club, we've been 5th row to a Dane Cook arena show and now I got to see one of the greatest comedians of this generation. Besides football, I think comedy is my favorite genre of entertainment, so the night was magical inside that amphitheater.

Eventually the show had to end though. Our good seats gave us a great opportunity to exit quickly and we made it to our car relatively fast. Then it happened... Nothing. The parking lot was literally at a standstill for 30-40 minutes before I decided that vehicular manslaughter was a feasible option. A lot of people were in line to leave but a lot of people were just milling around their cars waiting for the crowds to disperse. All of the sudden I saw some people creating their own exit path behind us. It was a clear path and could've been easily manged by one half-wit with a flash light. Instead people went all apocolypse and made their own rules... Long story still pretty long, White River Amphitheater was an absolute disappointment.

There wasn't enough people serving food and drinks but the jerk offs in blue shirts with walkie-talkies with the volume at full blast during the show were everywhere doing next to nothing. Among the hundreds of cars there were zero people directing traffic.  And as we sat in the chaos for an hour I pictured the venue head honcho 'Lou Albano' doing coke in the tour bus with an AV guy from Stage B. I was so surprised at how shitty things were being run that I even considered that maybe I was just in a bad mood, but when Hannibal Burress made it a point to mention how incompetent the venue staff was, I knew I was not tripping.

All in all, the show was phenomenal. I just have zero desire to ever go back to White River Amphitheater unless I get a helicopter ride in. So while I laughed my ass off for a solid few hours, the venue clearly is not concerned with training anyone. Since openly complaining about this on Facebook I see I'm not the only one with this disdain for White River but also that there is a decent shuttle option to get in and out swiftly. But forgetting the fact that these options exist, I can't stand any company that will take my money but won't have the decency to pretend they give a shit that I'm there.

Overall it was a great evening with my beautiful wife and we just have another story to discuss during our anniversary next year when we're celebrating somewhere else. To five years.

Transcendence: Childish Gambino - Because the Internet

I'm a fan of entertainment. TV, movies, sports, stand up, music, anything... And as a guy who considers himself pretty creative I understand how hard it is to commit to a creatively driven craft and excel. So when you see guys transcend one genre for another, it's impressive. We've seen lots of people do it; From Shaq taking his skills in the post to the recording booth and many Hollywood sets to Will Smith turning his silly raps into a mega star acting career.. But of all those that have tried, who failed and who has done it well?

Though he's found his niche in small bit parts of Hollywood, I think we can consider Shaq a failure for transcending a genre. He was great in one arena and not so great in the others mediums. Eddie Murphy went from stand up juggernaut to Hollywood super star but then he got a little too froggy and tried doing an album. He's not a terrible singer, but 100% fuck no Eddie. Even the greatest basketball player of all time "retired" from basketball to try his hand at baseball. Again, I think we can all agree that his Airness belongs on the hardwoods.

Then there is one of my surprisingly favorite entertainers of all time--- Justin Timberlake.

JT started in the Mickey Mouse club then he moved onto boy band member where he snagged up Britney Spears when she was still a catch. At that point he was an annoying teen heart throb like Beiber, The Jonas Brothers or those One Direction kids. They all are or were on a short list of 'children I would punch'. But once JT left the boy band and started standing up to piss, he began his ascension to legitimate stardom. His music was not really my flavor, but it was still good music, and it was when he hosted SNL that cemented my respect for the man. His timing is phenomenal and add music and dancing to it, he's the kind of triple threat we haven't seen in a very long time. I honestly think he's our generation's Frank Sinatra. Ol' Curly Hair. But I think he is just a born entertainer and he enjoys every second of it.

However, for guys like Justin Timberlake and Shaq, it almost feels like they had the advantage; They were great in one arena and easily given the opportunity to try other avenues of entertainment. Although I don't knock their work ethic, they didn't exactly risk everything to leave their comfort zone and pursue their dreams. The guys that seem like they grind their way into the circles are the ones I really admire. Maybe it's because their love for their art is so glaringly obvious.

Love him or hate him, Ashton Kutcher was smart enough to be a corporate success but he up and moved from Iowa to Hollywood and made things happen for himself. We all know Puffy and Jay Z's rise to the top of their self made empires. Guys like Mos Def and Common got hot on the streets with their music then took it as a challenge to be great at acting too. Neither are Oscar worthy yet, but they're both respectable actors. In all these success stories, one thing seems to be common- a passion for their craft.

Recently I ran across some music that I liked only to find out it is from a comedic actor that I really enjoy. The former NBC comedy 'Community' was about a group of community college students that found themselves in the most bizarre scenarios. From school sized pillow fort wars to a nefarious Trade School Dean trying to take over the school. It was like if the Muppet Babies went to college.

One of the actors from the show's name is Donald Glover. He also goes by the rap name Childish Gambino. He is clearly a talented actor that reminds me of Andy Samberg and like Andy Samberg, Glover wasn't a household name but he was a cult favorite. And they both thrived on the niche that they built for themselves.

 Loving his character on Community, anything I saw with him in it, I tried to consume. Just as Samberg and his friends took it upon themselves to write and produce Hot Rod, Donald Glover and company did a light hearted comedy about a kid mystery solving team. Absurd but hilarious and that is just my speed.

I eventually ran across a stand up special he did and was impressed. Going from stand up to acting is one thing, but going from acting to stand up is a whole different can of worms. It was clear he was new to the avenue but had lots of potential because he liked making people laugh. Then I came across one of his albums.

"Because the Internet" is an odd, upbeat and feel good hip hop album. It was not the traditional album with fifteen three-verse songs, but it felt almost like an opera following a young up-and-coming artist trying to find his way through the weekend. I don't mean that in a bad way either, it was actually pretty refreshing. You could feel his soul in the music. That is art.

Then there's guys like Kanye who yells some bullshit over a beat that sounds like a computer and garbage truck are copulating and calls it the greatest art of our generation because he thinks we really value his opinion that much. But what made his latest "album" so bad was that it had no coherence. I think he is becoming so arrogant and greedy that he thought he could shit in your ears and make money doing it.

 Because the Internet felt seamless.

It was so different and unpredictable that you couldn't always tell when one song ended and another began. It weirded me out at first, but I eventually found myself addicted to it. If you're looking for that traditional 15 track hip hop album, you'll probably be a little bugged by this album, but if you're a Talib Kweli or Mos Def fan that is open minded to untraditional hip hop, I feel like you'd enjoy it. It surely has that Westcoast feel to it too. He has clean lyrics both slow and smooth as well as fast and crisp. Content is not about gang banging or killing guys who don't respect him, it literally is what I would picture a good Molly trip at the club would be like. Not so weird that sober you can't vibe with it, but so eclectic that you never fall into a lull.

The thing I liked was he would jump from some crazy overloaded beat to a smooth song with excellent vocals from features like Jhene Aiko (who is quickly becoming a favorite of mine) and even laying good harmonies himself on songs like 3005. Never once did I feel like he was making a song because he thought the album needed a particular style intertwined within the stuff he actually enjoyed making- it was all about him expressing himself... And he's funny. I almost liken him to a hip hop version of Tenacious D. Gifted musicians putting a comedic twist to the music.

All in all, this album isn't going to win Grammy's but much like his acting career, I think it will find a following and gain a stronghold among the alternative rap libraries of the future. I know this album will not be everyone's cup of tea, but whether or not this fits my prototypical hip hop profile, it is unique.. Which at my age is a beautiful thing to experience. I think when you don't have the bright light on you it's a little easier to go in the direction you want because there is a lot less expectation, but not everyone has the balls to risk that. Some people are so worried that people won't like it that they tinker with it until it sounds like every other album on iTunes.

In my opinion, Donald Glover has found a way to do well in acting, music and stand up. He's hardly elite at any of these things, but he is darn near great in all three. My personal opinion is that because he truly enjoys each manner of entertainment, he'll never have to worry about getting good because that's just the natural result of practicing.

Though passion alone will not supercede lack of talent, transcending a genre is possible if you can just let go of the wheel and start creating.

Life is....

If we are casual friends, good friends or you've just seen my blogs before, you're probably pretty aware of how much I love football. I've always loved the sport. I remember wanting to play when I was like 8 but my dad said I wasn't old enough yet. He stuck me on a soccer team and I had to wait.

Since the Seattle Seahawks came into the NFL, somebody in my family had season tickets. My grandpa had 'em, then my dad took them over and now I have the season tickets. I always figured I just really loved the sport because of how awesome it is, but it's become clear to me over the past six months that football embodies something else much larger than just an interest in a sport. 

Since I can remember, football was a part of our family. I found a picture of my brother and I when we were like 3 and 7, rocking full Seahawk uniforms, shoulder pads, helmets and all. I remember my brother playing for the Bellevue Colts and eventually I would play for the same league and even get the same coaches. That was when I first really got a taste of winning. We won two consecutive league titles, even going undefeated in the second season and playing a game in the Kingdome before a Seahawks game. In our third season together we went undefeated again until losing in the championship game. 

Whether you're winning or losing, there was always a lesson to be learned. But I reflect on the fact that the person facilitating most of those lessons was my dad. I can still remember asking him questions about rules and old players he liked and now I realize that football gave me and my dad a reason to enjoy life together. 

As an adult my father and I talked roughly about two things: Work and sports. Since work is a drag and football was the house favorite, the Huskies and Seahawks were a main discussion point in their house. Every year when we pass my birthday and enter into August, it is bittersweet. Summer is ending, but FOOTBALL SEASON IS HERE! Life is just better during football season.

Fantasy drafts, watching your teams draft picks in the pre-season and preparing for all the games you'll be attending, these all signify that it is August. Only this year, it's more bitter than sweet. 

Five years ago my dad got diagnosed with cancer as so many good people do and through all the treatments, the good news and the bad news, I always remained optimistic. My dad was a real spiritual man so his impending fate did not weaken his resolve. Because of that even keel it was difficult to really gauge how things really were with his body. We golfed, went to games and even talked about our future plans. I never once thought "this could our last season together." 

Last year the Seahawks got hot. Expectations were high and our execution did not disappoint. It felt like it could finally be our year. I'd be lying if I said that wasn't a faintly familiar feeling in August and September. With all the good we saw on the field, my dad sat us all down around Thanksgiving and told us that they finally gave him a time table and it wasn't very long. 

The Seahawks season took on a whole different shape. Nobody wanted to talk about the bullshit that comes with knowing that your time is coming to an end, but we found comfort in talking football. I wonder if I'll eventually regret not having more serious talks in those final weeks, but I know that even talking about injuries and trades had a lot of value. The playoffs came and to me it felt like the football gods were going to give my dad a trophy before he was gone. We gave too much to this team over the years to get screwed over again. A title felt inevitable. We held out hope that my dad could go to the NFC Championship game but he wasn't up for it. My brother and I went and the stadium radiated with an energy that is indescribable. And like I would expect a higher power to do, they put a nuclear emotion into my body in the form of Richard Sherman's game winning tip. It was more than a win, it was a cosmic signal. It was telling me that there was a force at work. 

I'm not a real religious man and don't consider this a reason to start going to church, but it does tell me that Bob Marley was right and "every little thing's gonna be alright."

I went to my dad's house after the game and he just grinned from ear to ear but I don't think he was as happy about the Seahawks as he was at the sight of my joy. That was my dad. Have some integrity and learn to enjoy life. A few days later we won the raffle for Super Bowl tickets and although everything on the planet told me to go, I knew I had to watch the game with my dad. Tired, quiet, but smiling, my dad and I's last football game together was a Seahawks Super Bowl win. It might sound stupid to some, but that made me feel a whole lot better about my dad.

I got emotional over this thought when I turned on our first pre-season game on the tv, but as I think about this Thursday when my brother and I are going to be in the stands watching the Super Bowl banner be revealed, I can only imagine how many tears I'm going to shed. Forget the fact that it's a long overdue championship for my team, it signifies so much more than that to me. It literally is a way of life. My fathers.

I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and she screams Seahawks with a huge smile every time football is on TV and I plan on using football to do exactly what my dad did, teach her how to enjoy life. 

Love/hate relationship with my first true love, football... Renton, Wa

Well, it's late August and today is the final game of the NFL pre-season. Rosters are being finalized, responsibilities are getting re-prioritized in homes across the country and if you haven't drafted your fantasy team yet, you will be any day now. Football season is unlike any other part of the year. It's a love and passion that is hard to duplicate and it's a contagious positivity when your team is winning. I believe it's safe to say that I respect the game.

What I don't respect is the bureaucracy bullshit that happens throughout the league. Rules and regulations are established by the players and administrators of the league to protect each other and the integrity of the game. But so often when a questionable issue arises where a player may be getting the short end of the stick, commentators say things like "They lost this battle at the bargaining table." This is in reference to the Collective Bargaining Agreement that is revisited every handful of years. Player and league representatives basically draw up a "constitution" that spans for a set period of time that will be the rule book for governing the league. Just yesterday after a decision was made by the league to ignore the appeal of Cleveland wide out, Josh Gordon for failing a drug test I realized how obtuse the league really is.

This is Gordon's second failed test in 3 years, but admittedly the traces of the drug were so low, it'd almost be improbable for it to be from direct consumption. But a failure is a failure is a failure. I don't necessarily disagree with the way the drug program is setup in the league; Each failed test elevates your status in the program which in turn creates harsher punishments for each following offense. OK, fine. Get caught with steroids in your system once, 2 game ban. Twice, full year ban, and so on. But smoking marijuana? Hardly a drug that affects games like steroids do.

But how is it that smoking pot, which is legal in 2 of the 20 something states that the NFL operates in, gets you suspended for the year and being caught on video knocking your fiance out is only getting you suspended for two games?? I understand this was not Josh Gordon's first offense where as Mr. Ray "Not Nice" Rice had never gotten into any trouble prior to the KO of his now wife, but c'mon!

A handful of years back, Donte Stallworth who I believe was also playing for the Browns at the time hit a pedestrian in his car while drunk driving... That man died. Donte got the same suspension as Gordon. I'm sure if OJ was still in good shape, Goodell would consider his re-admission into the league. I'm dumbfounded.

Understandably I'm not the only person who thought this was the stupidest shit ever, so people complained about Rice getting off so easily. Rightly so, the NFL announced a new rule today specifically for domestic violence. For your first offense, you get a 6 game suspension; for a second offense, you're banned for life. At the surface, that makes MUCH more sense. We don't want some asshole who is built to punish the physically elite of the world, able to punish his partner (man or woman) without serious recourse, but now my concern falls into a deeper category. One that exists commonly in rape cases.

Let's be clear here, I DO NOT CONDONE RAPE. Not even a little bit. My concern is that our society treats the issue with such ferocity that sometimes an accuser doesn't even need any evidence to drag someone's name through the mud first. Then even worse, if they were to create some public spectacle only to later admit to lying, there is little to no recourse for the slandered victim. So essentially a woman could say "Why not, what have I got to lose?" And it's a shame because that takes an egregious act in which a person should be protected at all costs and makes people like myself start with a little skepticism rather than support. To this day, I think Kobe got fucked over. It's not a popular stance, but it's reality.

 It's not just athletes either, it's any entertainer that is at risk to be falsely accused. Women see women profit with settlements out of court and it no longer is a way to prevent the terrible act from happening again, it's a way to make some money; It could literally be your career. I bring all of this up to support the idea that the NFL is perpetuating a faulty system and while they continue to get richer, their commodities continue to lose value. Here is a particular scenario that I believe could be problematic given the black and white perspective the NFL currently holds.

Imagine a young man like Johnny Football coming out of college. Barely 21, so physically gifted that they never really intended to finish college, just get to the pro's and start signing contracts. There is nothing wrong with that; People forego school to jump into their profession every day, this should be no different. These kids go from broke students to millionaires over night and these same kids are going to make mistakes.

So one drunken night in Vegas a fight breaks out on the strip and everyone is trying to hold everyone else back and all of the sudden said rookie instinctually (but accidentally) pushes a lady down in the melee resulting in a severely bruised arm/leg/face/whatever. The act itself was not intended to harm the female, rather it was a matter of a legally drunk kid making a mistake that left someone (who may not be all that innocent in the first place) in pain. Since the woman knows he's a pro football player and has money, she decides to press charges. STRIKE ONE.

[disclaimer: if you honestly think I'm making these terrible types of people up, you are too naive to understand my argument, so you may stop reading now]

Now, for the rest of his career, this same player has to walk on eggshells in public and potentially isolate himself to avoid a second strike that could take his livelihood away. Not in a manner of 'staying away from violence' but having to avoid new people because he's worried he could get screwed. Forget the fact that this is a common bi-product of being famous, but imagine the mental impact of having to remain that guarded in order to stay employed the only way you know how. Now consider said player meets a girl while out with friends. She seems nice and sweet; This girl could come on to this player, take him to his or her room and instead of crying rape, she just has to wrestle with the guy enough that he accidentally gives her a big enough bruise that she could extort him. Seem implausible? Again, read the disclaimer above the last paragraph.

I say this all to draw the line that if the NFL is so black and white about their policies that a player who killed a man while drunk driving gets the same punishment as a man who possibly smoked a plant that is responsible for zero deaths or diseases (in fact, quite the opposite) and is far from performance enhancing, what kind of trouble will be created from this new domestic violence "fix"?

How about instead of letting Roger Goodell (who made 35 million in salary last year) be the fucking Pope of all things pigskin, you hire a panel of people like you would in a regular court room. Literally, Josh Gordon could invest $100,000 in a legal team that pulls experts and depositions from witnesses to defend himself and Roger Goodell can just look at it and say "Ehhhhh, nah. Suspended." I'm dumbfounded.

Furthermore, with all this bullshit about player safety being the new fad among the higher ups in the league, how is it that you treat someone who failed multiple drug tests by isolating him from his support system? A kid who has spent his whole life playing football trying to get to the big stage, makes a few mistakes off of the field and the teammates and coaches that helped support him through the hard times and celebrated him during the good times are no longer accessible to him? Do you honestly think that is helpful?

You're concerned about concussions because you don't want to get sued by the players and you don't want your sport to suffer. It has nothing to do with player safety. If it did, people like Wes Welker who has had more concussions than playoff appearances would not be allowed to play. If player safety was really a major concern, then you would spend some of the billions in UNTAXED revenue that you make each year (yes, the NFL is considered a non-profit organization because of the way the money is distributed, so they are tax exempt) and setup a program for these people to be cared for and guided. What is wrong with Josh Gordon coming to the building every day and practicing with the team? Learning to work hard without the payoff of playing in the games builds character.

The punishment is that he cannot make his salary (fair) and not participate in games that could also lead to future revenue of some kind (still fair), but what about the well being of the player? Should he lose a year of practice with his team? Should the team lose a leader because he made a mistake? I'm just fucking lost. How is it that nobody is up in arms about this? Can you lead a revolution against a company like the NFL? They know people won't boycott their product, which means sponsors will always be available, which means the cogs continue to turn regardless of how things are currently running.

Beyond the fact of all this non sense, the NFL is hands down my favorite thing on the planet to be entertained by. By the numbers, there is far less Tom Foolery happening in the league than there is good old fashioned football, but when the league is such a money maker, they tend to push their own agendas and the integrity of information and entertainment are ultimately compromised. This Josh Gordon/Ray Rice issue is just a symptom of a bigger problem and unfortunately I feel like it won't be addressed. The NFL released this new domestic violence rule as a way to "fix" the problem... Well good for you, you just took Nyquil to help you sleep but you still have a cold. It's just exhausting to love something when you know how broken it is. It makes you feel a little dirty when you think about it long enough. But it's a machine I don't think we can stop and they know it...

So as the NFL grows, it is becoming self aware. And if you ever saw any of the Terminators, that's never a good thing.

National Dog Day

Apparently today is National Dog Appreciation Day. My initial reaction to hearing this was 'Even dogs get a holiday?' Then I jokingly pictured a bunch of single women with trust issues at some community event at the park with their dogs, in matching outfits, legitimately celebrating the holiday. But after all my cynicism subsided, I thought "Well shit, what am I going to do for Dakota?"

We've had our salt 'n pepper Miniature Shnauzer for almost 7 years now. I had never owned a dog before and my then girlfriend had grown up with a Miniature Shnauzer. Naturally she pulled her mental ninjitsu and convinced me to get a dog the size of a large cat that required haircuts. Having grown up with cats in the house, a dainty pet was hardly new to me and when the people selling her pulled into the parking lot of our condo, I fell in love.

No bigger than a squirrel, this puppy was gently put down onto the concrete about 20 feet from me and like she already knew me, she sprinted across that wet pavement and immediately began smelling my pants and giving me those little puppy barks in excitement. This was foreshadowing at it's most subtle. The people came in and "interviewed" us while my girlfriend and I played with her on the floor next to the fireplace. My two cats steered clear, but when they did see the new family member they basically mean mugged, then went on about their night. It was instantly clear that this dog was going to fit in just fine.

We named her Dakota.

I happened to have gotten laid off a month or two prior to getting her, so it was just me and her for the bulk of the day for the first few months. It was as stressful as watching a child all day at some points, but we built a bond of playfulness and trust while I pretended to look hard for work. If you've got a soul and like animals, the interaction with your pet is typically pretty easy, but it's equally as easy to take for granted what they actually mean to you.

As I type this, Dakota sits there at attention on the carpet looking at me while one of my cats licks the side of her face. Not staring in a creepy way, but in a manner I've had to grown acustom to. I think it's a mix of not wanting me to go do anything fun without her, partly watching in hopes that I will have sneaked a snack by her that I may also drop on the floor. But I also like to think she is protecting me in some manner. I'll be the first to say that my dog is among the smarter dogs I've ever encountered, but she is an emotional wreck. So by saying 'protect', I really just mean she'd be the friend at the bar to just yell "look out" as a dude came barrelling across the room.

She is smart enough to master a dozen tricks and hand signals. She's smart enough to have graduated obedience school and continue into the advanced classes. She is however is so bad at managing excitement that we got expelled from the advanced course of obedience school. And if our daughter is asleep and anyone (my wife and myself included) is going to come in the front door of our house, they must first text whoever is expecting them to deal with the dog appropriately. Once she calms down, she's as normal as they come, but as she made clear in the parking lot of our condo so many years ago, new people get her excited!

But you know what? With all of her quirks, I wouldn't trade the little monster for the world.

She would follow me into Moridor, she doesn't take off if given free reign and no matter what happened that day, when I got home she is always happy to see me. She cuddles with everyone in the house including the cats. I recently saw her first hand defend one of my cats. Literally scared the piss out of a neighbor cat that was trying to flex in our front yard. She is a trooper when you go for a walk or jog. She will walk at your pace the entire time and when she gets home, she walks straight to her water bowl, re hydrates, then finds somewhere to collapse for a while.

I take her for granted some times when I really shouldn't. Dogs may not give you an intellectual stimulation of any kind (except when you're trying to figure out how the hell they got out of their pen), but they will teach and condition a number of your emotional cues on a regular basis. That's an underrated quality of a pet. Dogs are empathetic and are typically very sensitive, so it's good for people to interact with their pets. I think the one thing everyone has to remember about their pet is that they have a few fundamental rights as your pet.
-They deserve to be fed and sheltered (Don't get one if you can't afford one) (That goes for kids too)
-They deserve exercise and attention. If you're going to get a Pit Bull, don't make him live in an apartment.
-They deserve your protection and love. Hot cars, kennels for long periods of time, ignoring. All bad.

Typically if you get a pet, I'd like to think your intention was to care for it and hopefully you all are. But for those of you that love your dogs every day, remember to give 'em an extra belly rub and a milk bone tonight. They spend so much of their time trying to love you, it's time we repay the favor. And although I sort of despise another "holiday" because I know each new celebration is tied to revenue in one way or another, I am not afraid to find the silver lining in anything silly.


Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Progress

When you're young, you live your life in these little chunks of time. Recess always seemed like hours away, so no child cared about next week. Then you get into high school where you gain a little more perspective. "6 more months til I'm 16" , "This time next year I have to take the SATs" or "Oh shit, I have to mail my college applicaiton by Monday!" 

Your parents would bang it into your head over and over again. "What do you want to do after you graduate? Which college do you want to go to? Do you know what you want to major in?" But it just went in one ear and out the other. You know what I wanted to do? Go drink beer with my friends and see if I could makeout with someone... Preferably a female. 

If you take the college route, you either do two things- buckle down and bust your ass with your future in mind or dick off until the threat of failure leers at you. I took the latter route. I don't know when the switch turned on but I got accepted to the University of Washington in '04 and just subconciously decided to try for once. To that point, I never did the homework, I just aced the tests, so I always ended up with mediocre grades. Med-i-ocre. Thankfully my SATs helped support my argument to those in charge of letting me into the collegiant halls. 

Well I got in and just started the routine. I worked near full time as a waiter five minutes from my apartment that was essentially on campus and I lived by myself. That is until I enlisted Shady and 50 into my studious guild. Side bar: Shady is sleeping on the chair not 2 feet from me, while much like his name sake, 50 got caught slipping. Only he was not as fortunate as Mr. Jackson. But I digress. I stayed to myself and worked hard because I knew that progress is all I could ask for and you don't move forward without any effort. (Unless you're in space and someone pushes you from behind)

While at UW, I got recruited to help with the Literary Journal where I ended up being co-editor and contributor. I made the Dean's List more times than not and I stayed at it even through summer and finished 3 months earlier than everyone. Did I want to stick around for graduation to sit in the hot sun while they called 2,000 individual names that I don't recognize to a stage for a fleeting moment? Nope, I went to Italy "for work" and had the time of my life. But by now, there was no more wasted effort. Everything I did was to make progress. 

"How is a trip to Italy a move of progress?" You ask. 

Well I'll tell you. I worked for an Italian restaurant and we visited many wineries and had private tours and tastings with the owners of the vineyards; Some that were hundreds of years old. When I got back, my basic knowledge from the experience mixed with my self-proclaimed silver tongue led to HUGE WINE SALES. Money is progress, believe me. This is when I realized work could still be enjoyable if you actually liked the work.

Upon returning from Europe, I realized I had accomplished the goal of a college degree that l I had blindly chased for quite some time. I didn't have any grand plans for what to do next. I just knew I had to keep working. So I kept my job as a waiter as I started looking for "college graduate jobs"... Turns out, everyone else is looking to do that too? Weird. Cut forward to May of '08. I had gone through two "college graduate jobs" and hated both of them. All the while, staying employed at the restaurant to ensure I was making progress. The other jobs gave decent pay but they just didn't fit me. By this time I've rekindled a relationship I had thought about constantly since 2002, asked her to marry me (she said yes by the way) and I had an interview at a place that sold bedding stuff. BOO-RRING.

I got the job. 

I started  as an assistant to the purchasing department. I did the bitch work. But it was at this time where I finally had the clear motivation; a soon to be wife, plans to buy a house, plans for a family, student loans, etc etc etc... With those motivations, it's easy to stay busy. I kept my head down and busted my ass. My wife did the same. We live a humble life and have never stopped our forward motion. We've both moved up the corporate ladder and there still seems like plenty of room to climb and I just had a Powerbar. 

Up until now it felt like we were in a ditch we could never dig out of. Tangible progress was a decade away. But here we are in 2014 and the progress is finally starting to show. The whole time you work and work and work and feel like you're never going to get on top of things, but you do. 

I no doubt inherited my value of hard work from my Dad. I've never met a guy so dedicated to integrity and hard work. It was a little daunting to be honest. We may not have always had the newest stuff but we were absolutely never lacking; That's a pretty high bar when you're looking at tens of thousands of dollars in student loans while getting paid shit. But he always said "just work hard and it'll come." He recently passed away and it's a little annoying at how some things he always preached didn't really click until it was too late to give him the credit for the lesson.

There's always going to be obstacles, hardships and new goals. That's by design. We seek things we desire, which requires effort to obtain, and it's just a matter of prioritizing your desires. But I'm just writing to say that as long as you're doing your best and working hard, you'll eventually see all the progress you've made and are making and life instantly becomes a little less rigid. You don't want to work your ass off for nothing, so it's natural to want some tangible evidence that you're working for something... Just don't take 'tangible' so literal and I think you'll find it too if you're doing your best.

What in the Michael Sam hell is he doing?

Back when I read about NFL hopeful Michael Sam coming out of the closet I was struck with a few immediate thoughts.” I bet he wants to be a 49’er.” was my initial thought. My second thought was “Who the hell is Michael Sam?” I’m relatively up on college football and I had never heard of him. My final thought was “I sure hope he’s good.”

I welcome the social progress with open arms, but let’s not be naïve here; If he’s not good, this won’t make much of a social impact. Until we have a hard-nosed, respected  and feared opponent that also likes to watch musicals in his spare time, the stigma will still strongly exist. So as I watched the commentary progress from the announcement on ESPN to the NFL combine a couple weeks later, followed by the NFL Draft just last week, I waited.

Sam, the SEC Co-Defensive Player of the Year last year, on paper is a good player. His stats earned him multiple prestigious honors, his teammates respected him and he seemed like a good kid. However, his performance at the NFL Combine was poor. (For any non-NFL readers, the combine is where prospects go to workout for coaches to measure speed, strength, etc in preparation for the draft)

Some people were disgusted that he didn’t get drafted until the last round . “Oh, nobody took him because he’s gay.” Shut the hell up. He didn’t get drafted until then because he’s really not that good.  He performed poorly at the combine and didn’t impress much at any public workouts. People drop from mid-round projections to being undrafted every single year. Let’s also not forget that these projections are determined by countless assholes in the media who spew non-sense as if they’re certified NFL dieties that nobody will question.

 I for one was excited at the prospect of having a stud NFL linebacker as openly gay. It’s good for the players, it’s good for the league and it will be good for society. Which makes this post-draft circus all the more disgusting.

At first I was able to ignore the media. It’s a talent you must develop in order to consume anything on TV while remaining mildly un-retarded. The first wave was him coming out—“celebrate his courage.” Then was the combine—“he didn’t perform as well as he could have.” Then reality arrived.

At the draft, the media can play it’s part but at the end of the day, if you are good enough, a team will find a way to use you. Sam was chosen in the 7^th and final round of the draft (249^th of 256 picks). This essentially means that you’re going to have to bust your ass in every facet of the game in order to make that roster.  Not only do you need to perform on the field, you have to convince your coaches and teammates that you’re poised to be an NFL player off the field as well. Now that Sam has been drafted to the St. Louis Rams, this is his opportunity to be the leader of a new era of sports.

While Sam seemingly is a good kid, it was the article I read today that tells me this attempt at progress will fall flat and here is why. As mentioned, Sam’s draft position means he’s got a lot of work to do between today and August when the 53 man roster must be determined. That is common knowledge from the waterboy to the GM of the team. Guys in his position have to want it.

Sam doesn’t want it.

Shortly after the draft he had an interview where he rightly attended to the subject of how his being openly gay will affect his football career. He said he was just going to focus on football and that’s all that matters. CORRECT ANSWER! The question is, did he mean it? Generally that’s a judgement call to make, but I’m not calling Judge Judy on this one, this one is obvious. Michael Sam followed that quote with an announcement a few days later that he’s going to have a reality TV show on Oprah’s network…………. Um……….. You BARELY got drafted, haven’t even made the team and when your comments implied that you’d like to quiet the media commentary on his sexual preference, he goes and gives them an amplifier, dozens of microphones, arena sized speakers and OPRAH-FUCKING-WINFREY. ?.?.?

Now here is why I’m upset. He announced his business to the world likely for himself and/or his family. I applaud him for that. However, in his position, he had to understand the baggage that came with that. Whether he likes it or not, he’s now an official representative and he is blowing his boyfriend opportunity. It’d be one thing if he gave it his all and just couldn’t make the team; At least then we’d go to sleep having to believe he did his best. That is the characteristic that people want to associate with. But if you’re working reality TV deals before you even get your jersey, you’re an idiot, arguably selfish and frankly irresponsible. The only saving grace to the deal is that I do agree that if it helps get his story out to people struggling with similar issues, it’s productive. Apparently a 15 year old kid came out to his father as they watched Sam get drafted. That is invaluable. 

With all that said, doing what he's doing now will likely result in him getting cut, if for nothing else, because the team was concerned about his focus given his decisions. That's like selling your shares of stock knowing that with a little hard work and dedication, you could take that private company public. Sure you’re going to get the topic to the forefront, but if you don’t even make the team, your ability to keep the issue relevant for a long period of time is shortened to whatever community centers will let you speak while the Rams are on TV.  

I’m fully aware that as I sit here at my dining room table complaining, most of my problems likely do not coincide with that of a 24 year old kid who just go drafted in the NFL. But common sense should bind us all. If it did, this place would run much more smoothly.

All in all, I still completely support the kid (even though he’s on a division rivals team). I’m just disappointed at the execution of this all. He is publicly falling short of his potential and that bums me out. Fifty years down the road, I’d like to have seen him remembered as a pioneer. But right now, he’s more likely to end up on a list with Ryan Leaf and Bryan Bosworth.